Geek love

I figure the next stop on my search for a mate is the exciting world of dating sites for nerds. Fortunately, Nerve.com was kind enough to do a roundup of geek-romance nodes (isn't "node" a nerdy word?) so I don't have to. I did, however, write an article once about love among Seattle's hardcore Scrabble enthusiasts. It doesn't get a whole lot geekier than them.

Additive properties

During a spare moment in chem class, I did a few simple equations and discovered that I spent roughly two-thirds of the '00s in relationships. The percentage surprised me a bit, and I started wondering whether a higher single-to-coupled ratio would be healthier.

Like other people I've known over the years, including some of the women I've dated, I prefer not to be single. But maybe deciding to be single for a while would be a good thing. I know someone who strung together five two-year relationships (= 10 years of being somebody's girlfriend) from the middle of high school until well after college, starting a new one whenever an old one ended, like a chain smoker. Finally, after boyfriend #5 fizzled out, she went on a relationship "fast," and the experience was positive. She realized she could survive on her own.

The yearning to find a partner is, of course, a natural one, especially for someone who's almost 31. But the "why" of that yearning -- to escape loneliness, to feel desired and therefore desirable, to bolster flagging self-esteem -- is where the problem often lies. My determination to get regular exercise and lose weight is partly about wanting to feel comfortable in my own body, and thus confident enough to enter a relationship for the right reasons -- or at least fewer wrong ones. It might also make dating a little less nervewracking.

R.I.P., Eileen

Earlier today, I found an obituary from February that listed a friend I'd lost touch with: Eileen Mintz, whose passion for food matched her formidable PR skills. I met her through my work as a food writer for Seattle Weekly, but she was more than just a professional acquaintance. Even though we didn't see each other too often, her kindness to me resembled that of a loving aunt, albeit one with better connections and juicier gossip than any actual relative I've ever had. Eileen was a matchmaker, too, and though she never made any money at it, she probably could have.

I interviewed her about her knack for pairing people up for the Weekly's Valentine's Day issue in 2006, and the resulting piece provides a sample of Eileen's offhand wisdom and joie de vivre. After the interview, she drove me to the house of Emily Cunningham, whom I'd just started dating. That very night, Emily and I began a relationship that would last two and a half years. Coincidence? Doubtful. Befriending a matchmaker gives you an unfair advantage in matters romantic; I highly recommend it.

Wherever you are, Eileen, I hope you're eating well and helping people date better. I'm really sorry I missed your memorial service.

Need dating advice?

Sasha has you covered.

"This zen world you're enjoying/Just makes you really annoying..."

Many thanks to Reed for introducing me to the lovable, hilarious phenomenon that is Garfunkel and Oates:

A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again Until I'm 45

Attended a JDate mixer tonight for a proposed Jew-ish.com piece. Sadly, the event was lame in an exceedingly boring way, so there won't be an article after all.

All right, Facebook dating ads, you win

In the past, I've mocked Facebook's pathetic attempts to find me a girlfriend based solely on my Facebook doings. But today I was presented with a small ad accompanied by the above picture. (BTW: Is that just Kate Bosworth in glasses?) The headline read: "Like geeky girls?" Oh, Facebook -- if you have to ask, you already know the answer. Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. You've seen through me, straight through to my most secret soul. I guess I no longer have the right to mock you. You nailed me, Facebook. I only wonder what I did -- what groups I joined, for example -- that resulted in this ad.

JDate Village '09

It's like the Olympic Village. Except here the sport is finding an attractive Jew to marry.

A friend has already voiced her unwillingness to go, but if you go, please blog about it at Jew-ish.com. I'll even lend you my login. I'm just that eager to know what the hell actually goes on at these things. I mean, besides the obvious rum 'n' hookup combo.

Dating advice from Facebook

A little while ago, my Jew-ish.com editor, Leyna Krow, complained that Facebook's sidebar ads, which are supposedly based on users' interests, were trying to find her a Jewish husband. After one "Jews: Don't Marry Non-Jews" ad too many, she posted a heartfelt rant on Jew-ish.com's blog. Now the networking site has some romantic input for me: A recent sidebar ad directed me to GothHookup.com, no doubt the Internet's premier site for those who desire mates with pale skin, magenta hair, and any number of piercings. (In case you share my alleged taste, eHow.com has some helpful tips on snagging an eligible Goth.)

My theory is that these targeted ads know both Leyna and me better than we know ourselves; they seem to be tapping into some dark corner of our subconscious. Forget that Ms. Krow doesn't require her dates to be Jewish, and that I prefer mine not to appear undead. In fact, forget everything we think we know. Facebook has been studying us for years, accumulating data points while watching our every move. If it thinks we want Jews and Goths, far be it from us to protest. Unless, of course, tomorrow's ads tell us what we really want is to make sweet love to Portuguese shrimp farmers. Facebook, may thy whimsical will be done.

The British version is still better...

...but the American version of The Office is starting to grow on me. Here's one reason why (sorry about the shoddy recording):

Where love and letter tiles collide

Now that I'm single and addicted to Scrabulous, this article seems apt.